Post 5: Au Revoir Mumbai Mantra Sundance Institute Screenwriter's Lab (Because 'goodbye' is so difficult to say)

Lord Krishna stands in the Tribhanga posture

I have a leisurely breakfast. My first session of the day is a free one. I am looking forward to writing Anu’s introduction (without dialogue J). 

At breakfast Sarthak with his headphones sits next to me. I want to know what he’s listening to. As if he’s read my mind he hands me the headphones and asks whether I like original sound tracks of films. I love OSTs. He promises I’m going to love this one-OST of Cinema Paradiso-Wow! It’s amazing. It’s put me in another world, another space, another frame of mind immediately. Zen! No wonder Sarthak doesn’t look like someone who is really part of our ribbing and chatting (except of course when he’s with his Bengali brigade!)He is either deep into his music or with his phone taking amazing pictures of all the proceedings.

Das Kapital oops! DasGuptas

Immediately after breakfast we have a feedback meeting of all the fellows with Michelle, Paul, Rohit and Aparna. They tell us how we are all going to be connected forever, a lovely film family. They will continue the mentoring as and when they can read our latest drafts, they will actively help us with contacts and introductions if we were to need them in USA. All of us are so relieved. It is so important for us to get feedback on our rewritten screenplays. We are all starting to feel the pangs of separation already, a bit orphaned almost and the scary feeling of being left alone on this journey once again is quite depressing. The assurance that not only will our screenplays be read by our mentors but both Sundance Institute and Mumbai Mantra look forward to all the updates about us, even of other writing work we are doing put the smile back on my face. Talk about sone pe suhaagaa!

Deeply reassured I head back home (room 3019) to write. From what Asif said yesterday most of what all the mentors wanted to tell me about “Tribhanga”had been said and done. What would Marti (Noxon) and I discuss? I think I’ll write something new and read it out to Marti. It would help me find out if I am going in the right direction. 

When I take out the notebook that I write in, I feel as if I’ve looked at it after so long. So many things have happened since I last wrote in it. I always write long hand. I can never start writing directly on a laptop. The physical aspect of watching the ink flow, to see it in my cursive handwriting, to scratch some things out, to doodle, are all very important for me to get the creative juices flowing. Sure enough, the moment my pen touches paper, it does not rest till I have poured out all that I have thought of, about Anu’s introduction. I remember the “Do Re Mi” song in Sound Of Music. The lyrics go, “Let’s start at the very beginning, A very good place to start; When you read you begin with A B C, when you sing you begin with Do Re Mi….”. So the introduction is a good place to begin. Somehow it flows so easily. It’s amazing what great guidance can do for you. My strides have an extra spring as I go for lunch.

At lunch it hits me that tomorrow at this time I will be on my way back home. None of us want the Lab to end. Even our lovely Mumbai Mantra gang of girls, Aparna, Rachna, Sneha and Himani carry the weight of the goodbyes we’ll have to say tomorrow.

It’s time to face my last mentor at the Lab. My newly written introduction in hand, I look for my mentor.

MARTI NOXON: (Buffy The Vampire Slayer) “Emotional”

                      

Marti has been very friendly from the very first meeting at the pre Lab dinner at Mahesh Lunch home. We’ve had so many general conversations before this that I am looking forward to this one related specifically to my screenplay. First of course I compliment her about her regular physical exercise. She attends Olivia’s Yoga session early every morning. She is really very fit. We also have another huge common point to discuss, our kids. Hers and mine are both exactly the same ages. In fact I’ve realised moms are moms anywhere in the world. Michelle’s children are in their twenties (technically you can’t even call them children) but when Michelle talks about them, I see the same worry, same pride, same concerns I have about my kids. Marti does mention that there is very little left for her to discuss about “Tribhanga”. The other mentors have really gone into the details. We talk of all the characters. She reiterates the relationships that need a once over. I ask her if I can read out what I’ve written. She is more than happy to react to it. I read it out to her and she responds very positively. She looks at me with her twinkling blue-grey eyes (so many shades of grey!) and says I’m on the right track. She encourages me not to give up what is so uniquely mine in the haze of all the ‘shoulds’ and goes on to tell me how much she’s loved Anu.

I feel like a proud mother whose kid has been praised for being talented. My Anu’s quite popular with my mentors.

We then talk of how she began writing and what her childhood was like. I am touched that she is sharing a part of herself with me with such generosity. It is quite a girly, emotional sharing. What a fitting end to the gruelling mentor-fellow discussions.

Mumbai Mantra has arranged for Mehendi artists for all of us. Marti is really excited about getting mehendi on her hands. So are Malia, Jackie, Michelle and I. I love Mehendi! The expert Mehendi artists draw beautiful patterns on our hands. The colour will keep increasing under the Mehendi and even long after it is taken off. Much like our Lab. The effects on our writing, our thinking, our approach is going to be so different, enhanced in all ways.

 We have a wrap up of the lab where all the mentors, Michelle, Paul, Rohit, Aparna and us fellows share the one memory that we will leave with, at the end of the Lab. There are so many, how can I talk of one. The Lab has impacted everyone very deeply. Apart from the generosity of the mentors, the hospitality of the Club Mahindra team has been outstanding. We say our half byes because the evening is going to be celebrated ‘Bollywood Ishtyle’. Everyone is looking forward to enjoying their last supper at Pavna.

Suddenly all that we have been taught is suspended as the DJ plays everything from Fevicol, to Zandu baam, to Fire Brigade to Jalebi Bai. It’s what we have to compete with, as we get out of here. The 100 cr club v/s the 1 cr gang.( I can see West Side Story in this battle). Mumbai Mantra has specifically told the DJ to play songs from the films our Indian mentors (Sabrina, Habib Faisal and Anjum Rajabali) are associated with. They also play my “Lo Chali main…”from “Hum Aapke Hain Koun”and insist I dance with it while it is showing on a big screen. It’s strange to dance to that track after 19 years and I see my mentors watching the screen with excitement because most of them haven’t seen me in my actress avatar at all. Their faces are worth recording. But then everything about the Lab is worth recording. Himani is the queen of the dance floor. She is so graceful and knows each and every step from whichever song is played. Her’s is an amazing performance. Paul is the other rockstar on the floor. The more Bollywood it is, the better for Paul. He dances like a man posessed. To see Joshua dance is also quite a treat, so different from his serious, studied personality. The last supper has really been energetic. After all the armchair thinking we've done, this pure dhamaal masti is such a refreshing change. Love every bit of it. It's well past midnight when we leave with a heavy heart.

Sumptuous isn't it?

Nitin and Dani- Writer-Director with DOP

The next day we leave after breakfast. We are packed in our cars and leave this dreamy place and time behind. Pratim, Sarthak, Nitin and I are in one car. That’s nice. Some more time to spend with them. We hit the 10 kms rough patch as soon as we leave the Resort. Again a reminder of reality.

I think of Robert Redford and what he has started and I thank him silently. He’s a real superstar. He has begun a movement of which I am a poud part. I thank him for his vision, philanthropy and generosity. And I thank all my mentors, facilitators and fellows too. And I know I will be thanking all these wonderful people every single day of my life.

Robert Redford (founder Sundance Institute)

  Kabir says it so beautifully:

       Yeh tana vish ki belari

          Guru Amrit ki khaan

              Sees diye jo Guru mile

                                 Toh bhi sastaa jaan!

Kavanjit caught between two tele'phonys' Pratim and I

Michelle, Bill wheeler, Malia (hidden), Habib and I

Neha and I (the hearts say it all)

Neha and Habib- no shadow of doubt!

Creative juices!

So if you have a story to tell I urge you emphatically to do what you must do. Log on to www.mumbaimantra.com and you’ll get all the details. Do not miss this opportunity. It is truly lifechanging! And now that I know a bit about screenplay writing I’ll end my Lab experience with- Fade out. J

POST 4: Paanch Adhyay aur Paanchva Adhyay bhi: 4 DOWN 2 TO GO! Sundance Institute Mumbai Mantra Screenwriting Workshop.

Room number 3019. Already home for me. We,humans are so strange! Adjusting to a new situation takes very little time. Adaptability! A part of evolution. “Tribhanga”is adaptable too. It’s already gone through a sea change since I’ve come here. It's more evolved now.

It's wonderful breakfast time  in the company of people I can now confidently count among my friends. J

After breakfast we all troop dpwn to the screening room for “Paanch Adhyay”,a film in Bengali directed by Pratim D Gupta, the baby (only age- wise) among us fellows. Pratim has a Yoda-like quality;an innocence coupled with a maturity way ahead of his years.

Paanch Adhyay starts with a beautiful Usha Uthup song and my spirits lift immediately. The aesthetically done titles shows the work of someone who understands the medium very well.

“Three gone, three to go” the first chapter in the five chapters is announced. The beautiful Dia Mirza is perfectly cast, but I immediately have a problem with the way Priyanshu plays the lovesick hero. Over the next two hours we go through the ups and downs in the relationship between this couple which marries, loses the romance, finds it elsewhere and comes back together only when they know that they are to be separated by a cruel circumstance. Why do we not say “I love you" enough, when we have the time? “Why don’t we show that we care? Why don’t we improve upon what we have rather than finding it in someone else? Why do we understand the importance of our spouse only when it’s too late? These are some of the questions which are thrown up through the story. The couple rests on the beach at the end of the film in a beautiful interlocked way; they are so much in sync but it’s too late. They are yin and yang; one incomplete without the other. There will be other lives together but this one’s all but wasted.

What works is the amazing visual sense that Pratim has. He has a very assured hand. I love Soumitrada’s scene-what a class act! And the lovely Dia in her tasteful Bengali sarees (I want them all) is beautiful to watch. What doesn’t work is the screechy second lead, a very important part of the narrative. She is playing Priyanshu’s ‘Charu’ (he is a reputed film director). The iconic ‘Charulata’ by Ray, Anna Karenina and Madame Bovary from literature have influenced generations of students of literature and cinema. The reference to a modern take on “Charulata” and the metopher of “Black Swan” is unfortunately not used very effectively in “Paanch Adhyay”  Good intentions,not so good results. The song that is used as a recurring theme through the film and which the film ends with, stays with you long after the film is over. But all in all “Paanch Adhyay”is a very brave film, even more so because it is Pratim’s first film. It reflects Pratim’s personality, mature beyond his age and it also means we have a writer-director among us who’s definitely going to go places with his next.

And now it’s time for my “Paanchva Adhyay”, my fifth mentor encounter. It’s Asif Kapadia.

ASIF KAPADIA: ( The Warrior, Senna) “ENDEARING”

                    

We find ourself a corner near the pool, used for lounging under normal circumstances. We, of course are going to use it for an intense discussion about my “Tribhanga”. Asif confesses that since the four previous mentors have already touched upon most of the glaring problems in my screenplay, he would like to discuss his response and get a feel of my writing through what kind of things I liked or disliked in my personal life. That’s different. That’s nice. Asif’s grey eyes are so reflective, introspective and exude peace. If I was Bertolucci making “Little Buddha”now, I would cast Asif in the role of the young Prince Siddharth whose tryst with pain and suffering led him to form a casteless, equal religion which showed the path to Nirvana by detaching oneself from all attachment; Buddhism. And I hold on to every word like a faithful devotee; Buddham Sharanam Gachhami! :-)
I keep berating my screenplay for lacking a strong story. Asif tells me quite categorically that a screenplay doesn’t have to follow the rules. I say that I can only break the rules if I know them. A valid atheist is one who knows his religion before denying God. I sheepishly admit I had no clue about the rules of screenplay. My knowledge of writing or even direction was through observation, seeing films, reading literature, learning on the job as an actress. I’ve had no formal training. Of course by now I did have a very good idea of what a good screenplay was meant to be. He asks me what my inspiration for these characters was. I tell him like I told my other advisors. He says he is amazed at the intensity of emotion there is in my characters. And surprisingly, it has a lot of humour too. He asks me what changes I foresee now that I have interacted with so many experts. I say I want to make my screenplay less verbose. I confess the obvious; my characters speak way too much. He says that’s not such a bad thing because he loves my dialogue writing. He says writing dialogue is a skill not many screenwriter’s are good at! Wow! That’s a huge compliment! He says I should not lose the punch in the dialogue while I am sorting out the story. Sometimes you don’t require to go from A to B to C if A is all that you want to say. You have to know what you want to say through your screenplay completely and you have to show it visually. He’s hit the nail. The screenplay wouldn’t sound so voice heavy if we could see it equally strongly. He says that’s going to be easy for me considering I’ve got the difficult part (characters and dialogue) out of my way. Wow! He’s so good for my ego. A small hopeful voice in my head asks, “ May I take you home with me Asif?” (Of course the voice stays in my head!)

He then turns to the male characters who are hardly developed. Again, the smile in those inward looking grey eyes (so many shades of grey; from Bill to Joshua, Malia to Asif) he says I don’t really blame you for the inconsequential men; they usually are. Yaaay! He’s a feminist!But he loves the character of Anu’s brother Robindro and wants me to give him a good look, as well as the character of Milind who is a biographer. Hmmm I agree completely. He asks me which film is my favourite. I answer without hesitation, Guru Dutt’s “Kaagaz Ke Phool”. He confesses he hasn’t seen it, but wants me to tell him why I like the film so much. I narrate the story and as I come to the end he says that it is a tragic story. I agree. He asks me whether that is the mood I want to create in my film/s. I disagree. My endings are always hopeful, not completely happy but better off than before. I’m an incurable optimist. I also love humour, satire, slapstick. I want to tell him that I love Dr Strangelove, Chaplin and Jaane Bhi Do Yaaron too, but I stop myself. He immediately says that my writing has too much humour in it to make it a classic tragedy.

It’s amazing how fidgity Asif is, shifting in his lounge chair every two minutes, trying to find equilibrium; but his thoughts, his even temper and focus belies that. Detached attachment? He asks me if I had anything else to add or ask. I don't have anything to ask or say, but I don't want this to end. This conversation has comforted me. It's warm khichdi for my soul. I have been magically healed. I can see that he is looking forward to a very good screenplay from me. I don't ever want to disappoint him! 
He tells me a few exercises he thinks would help me ‘see’ the film.
1) A chronological time line for all the major characters. 
2) 10 important events. 
3) Three page story. 
4)Only visual screenplay without the dialogues(the most important exercise for me, according to Asif).

It’s strange how after every intense advisor-fellow session I go back with so much inside me, so much has happened in terms of growth, enrichment; yet so little has changed outside.

I have so much to do and now I just want to sit and write.

I am glad for the free afternoon I have. I go to the Spa with my free voucher (Mumbai Mantra has spoiled us silly! I mean where do writer’s get so much bhaav? That too writer’s who are learning to write? But I’m not going to think along those lines.Main toh ab aam khaaungi, guthliyaan kyun ginun?)

The wonderful foot massage I get not only relieves the ill effects of the walk down to Pavna and the cramps that happened yesterday but also sharpens my thinking.Bliss!!!

After a sumptuous dinner we watch Carlos Cuaron’s short film “Second Bakery attack” based on a Murakami short story. He says he wants to show it because short films don’t get shown enough. He is so right. There is a hierarchy even in cinema. Feature length films always come first. Opportunities for shorts or documentaries are so rare. Carlos, the writer of the film with a cult following “Y tu mama tambien” is a very funny, honest man. He is Mexican and one can see the cultural difference between him and our American advisors at once. The distance in miles between USA and Mexico is not as much as the cultural difference. In fact watching his “Rudo y Cursi”I can’t help but notice the same chaos that defines India, especially Mumbai. I’m drawn into the tale of two football loving brothers at once. There sibling rivalry and revellery is endearing, emotional, bitter, funny, sometimes politically incorrect. I love listening to their Spanish. The bumbling brothers, their passions (which lead to their downfall) and their talents,(which they don’t appreciate enough) are so real I can almost see Carlos and his filmmaker brother Alfonso in their place. All writing stems from such a personal space. The q & a is also thoroughly entertaining. We get a good insight into Mexico through his film. Films are such a good way to travel! When Carlos confesses that the really kitschy parody of a song video shown in the film, of the kind he completely hates, goes on to become hugely popular, he is flabbergasted. He shares how one can never tell the response of the audience. 
Sitting in that screening room are twenty unique people with twenty unique responses. Once again the complete humility and vulnerability with which he answers hits me. Every time is like the first time, however lauded you are. Each new person is a potential critic or admirer. And the space between the end of the film and the first question is always the most painful.

I’m looking forward to writing tomorrow. Tomorrow is my Chhatva Adhyay and the last. I have a session off in the morning before my last advisor session.This dream experience will end. Not a very happy thought. Goodbyes scare me. Being a bad writer scares me more. But there is just so much that I have got out of this experience, I don’t want to think of the things that will make me cry. I will sleep and I will dream of Anu, Robindro and all the lovely people at the Lab. 
The real and reel will mix seamlessly.

Post 3; Day 2: Mumbai Mantra Sundance Institute Screenwriter's Lab.

DAY 2: What lies in store today?

At breakfast there is a lot of banter between Fellows. Neha is constantly ribbed and Terrie is called ‘Oh Teri’by Nitin. Nitin’s the PJ king among us and I come a not-so-close second. Sarthak with his earphones (was he born with them?), Pratim and Abhijit are into Bonging (that’s the word for Bengalis bonding) The lighthearted beginning to our day is a must in light of the serious discussions we are going to have with our mentors very soon.

 

First stop is our screening room where Nitin’s film ‘Filmistaan’is going to be shown. I am very curious about the kind of film Nitin has made. This guy whose day starts with looking at the bowl of honey at the breakfast table and saying‘Hi Honey’ has come to the Sundance Lab with a script inspired by Saadat Hassan Manto’s stories; he’s a study in paradox. As “Filmistaan” unfolds one gets drawn into the simplicity by which Nitin has told this humane tale. Pakistan and India, two nations, pitted against each other, being taught distorted histories so that hate is passed down the generations just as passionately as precious family heirlooms. But there’s a commonality that knows no boundaries. Something that runs deeper than hate. Here Nitin has used Indian films as a deep rooted connection. Also cricket in the latter half, but predominantly Film. The film unfolds with endearing simplicity, pathos, emotion and humour with the sceptre of untold violence and atrocities always evident in the background (the Taliban).Above all the film talks of friendship and loyalty. The performances (outstanding Sharib Hashmi and Inaamulhaq), dialogue and music carry the message beautifully.I’m impressed. No wonder the film is declared the best film in Hindi at the National Awards this year. There’s a lesson. Don’t ever judge a filmmaker by his ‘Hi Honey’s =D.

We’re ready to face our music for the day. I look for my mentor.

 

MALIA SCOTCH-MARMO: (the Hook, and worked with Steven Spielberg on many scripts) “Emphatic”

 

Malia and I have already got to know each other a bit at breakfast and lunch so I don’t feel as awkward as I felt with Bill or Joshua. She loves and admires all things Indian. She dresses in churidar kurtas and so does her daughter Jackie who has accompanied her to India. So it’s not surprising that she connects very deeply with the women characters in my script. When I tell her that strong, outspoken women are rare in Indian films except within the patriarchal framework; she says they are rare anywhere in the world!(the single largest minority-women)  She finds out from me what my interactions with Bill and Joshua were like and whether that had brought up any questions I would like to discuss. I ask her simply whether she believed I could make a good screenplay out of the material at hand. She emphatically says that I could! She praises the material at hand (because I can’t really call it a screenplay as it exists now) for it’s rawness and passion and reminds me that while getting into the structure, I should not lose out on these qualities that I have. That said, she tells me how a classic screenplay is divided into 5 parts. The introduction of the protagonist; then a bit of a resolution but not completely; the midpoint where things get very complicated; nearer the end when the situation is resolved but the film doesn’t end right there, it moves on to the point where you allow people to come out of the film and go home (hopefully happily). Give the audience a sense of closure.

She tells me that the introduction to my protagonist (Anu) has not been worked out very well. A) A lot of thought must go into how Anu is to be presented B)We must find out more about Anu’s character through some obstructions in her path which come as a surprise for the audience. An obstruction could be anything stopping her from doing whatever she wants; a thought, diversion, person, situation-anything. She says that introductions of all other primary as well as secondary characters have to be given the same thought and care. So we try and work out the different ways to deal with Anu’s introduction.

These are such important, practical and basic things. I am kicking myself, for not studying screenplays of films I’ve loved,for not reading published screenplays before I started writing this one.

I am thinking she must be feeling tired discussing such basics with me, but Malia doesn’t belittle me at all. In fact she shares so many stories, both personal and professional, that I feel I’m talking to a friend I’ve met after a very long time.

I’m also touched by the fact that she talks of Anu and my other characters as if they were living in the flesh. That makes me really want to see them all on the screen as soon as possible. I see the copious notes, markings and circling she has done on each and every page of ‘Tribhanga’and I feel truly privileged to be at the receiving end of such generosity.

At the end of our session she shares very humbly that with all the knowledge of what is right and what is wrong even expert screenwriters suffer from severe lapses of judgment and produce screenplays that do not work at all.

That’s so heartening and scary at the same time. Unki yeh gath hai toh hamaari kyaa hogi?

Terrie, Kavanjit, Aparna and Sarthak

It’s lunch time…… food, food, food, food, wonderful food (to be sung to the tune of the Amul doodh ad)

I’m ravenous. Anjum spots me and says that it is him and me next. He doesn’t have to remind me because we get a sort of call sheet every evening about what the programme is for us the next day. We also have Aparna to shepherd us in the right direction. I wish our film industry worked with such discipline. It’s amazing how I’ve not seen a single battle of the egos as yet. It’s so refreshing. It’s not just the air in Pavna. It’s the atmosphere at the Lab. And that comes from the top. Michelle and Paul come with that philosophy and partner with only the kind of people who will see their egalitarian, respectful, disciplined philosophy through. And they’ve really found the ideal partners in Mumbai Mantra; in Rohit and Aparna. I can’t believe I didn’t know any of them before this Lab!

Rohit Khattar (Mumbai Mantra)

Michelle Satter(Sundance Institute)

 

 

 

ANJUM RAJABALI: (Ghulam, Drohkaal, Rajneeti,  Aarakshan, Satyagraha) “EMPATHIC”

 

 

Anjum has single-handedly changed the face of our Writer’s Association. Due to his discipline, commitment and interventions, thousands of writers have been given their due. He is the only Indian mentor I have and I am really nervous about what he is going to say. None of the other mentors have a clear idea of what making an Indie film in India involves, but Anjum knows it all. He is part of the system and yet out of it. Also he knows the cultural ethos of my characters perfectly.

As we sit down to chat he categorically says that he has a very specific agenda vis a vis my script because the mentors earlier have dealt with quite a lot of what needs to be said. But in terms of the story (which he gently reminds me I don’t have)he has a lot to say and ask. So first he starts with my inspiration, why I decided on this particular line of thought rather than any other. Through these questions we come up with a lot of personal stories, his and mine which help us delve into the emotional core of my screenplay. I am privy to some of the dysfunctional relationships in his life and I feel so touched by the confidence he places in me. I feel almost like a Father hearing a confession. And immediately I apply the same sanctity to it. The converse therefore is also true. What I tell him stays between us. An unsaid pact, pretty rare for people who are practically strangers. And so we go through the emotional graph that my screenplay should take. He tells me that my characters speak so brutally and honestly that it is visceral……”baat aatonse aati hai”he says. That’s a huge compliment! Somehow,It is very important to me and my self confidence that Anjum should like my writing. And I love the way he tells me that there are huge lacunae and huge problems with my screenplay as it stands; but despite that there is something about it which brought it from a journey of 1 among 500, to 200, to 30 and finally 8. As I am reminded of that, I realise the faith by which I have been brought here. I am also reminded not to get daunted by the task ahead. Anjum assures me of any help I need even after we go back from the Lab and my spirits rise. I am already feeling horrible that all this luxury of ONLY thinking about writing in an elite group of writers, with the best mentors and the best hospitality ever,is soon going to end.

The last things Anjum suggests are some practical things to do. First download Celtx free screenwriting software, write a 2-3 sentence premise, a 1 page pitch, a 4 page story outline and a step outline of each scene and then I’ll be good to go. That’s all there is to it Anjum says with a broad grin and pats me on the back in an avuncular manner.

Whew! That’s all there is to it? That’s ALL? Ha ha ha ha!

(I laugh a lot when I’m hysterical)

I can see ‘Tribhanga’taking forever because the “that’s all there is to it” could take a lifetime!!!

After these four sessions there is so much to mull over and assimilate that I am looking forward to some time I’m going to get for rumination. A trip down to Pavna lake has been arranged. I go to the screening room where everyone is to assemble, to say my byes. But that is not to be! My Fellows protest my not going. But I don’t have walking/running shoes I tell them. (I didn’t get any because I wanted to concentrate only on mental exercise in the Lab). Our beautiful facilitators from Mumbai Mantra, Rachna, Himani and Sneha said that they would help me climb down but I should definitely go along. My protests about not having shoes are drowned out by everyone. They say that I would require a will to walk, not shoes. Ok! I am convinced. Lake Pavna from a distance is so beautiful, it would be good to experience it from up close. And with all the wonderful food at the Lab I think a bit of physical exercise would do me good.

The descent to Pavna is steep and I managed with a lot of help from Sneha. My toes are desperately trying to grip the chappals which are just not in a mood to go in that particular direction. But reaching Pavna makes it worth all the trouble. We relax, click pictures of each other and enjoy the solace of silence that only nature can offer.

Himani, Aparna, Sneha, I and Rachna
 

 

 

 

 

But it is soon time to return. The climb up is really steep. I am huffing and puffing on the way up. Just about a fourth of the way up my chappals give up AND I get a cramp in my poor toes. It is so excruciatingly painful, I want to howl. How am I going to make it? Suddenly everyone feels guilty about forcing me to come without shoes. I try walking barefoot and immediately get a cramp in my other foot as well! Malia has extra sandals(bless her), so Aparna wears Malia’s sandals and lends me her shoes. But I can’t raise either foot without making the cramps worse. This is terrible! It would soon be Sun down and that would make climbing up worse. Poor Nitin is rubbing my feet,trying to get the cramp out desperately.

Others are giving me juice, water to drink and bananas to eat. The only happy guy is Kavanjit because he was huffing and puffing as badly as I was, and he desperately needed the rest. Sarthak said that I should not worry about the dark because we have torches. A small voice in my head says ",what if we’re stuck here for the whole night?" I bawl. The pain in my feet and that there are seven people stuck here with me due to my cramps is just too much to take. My friends don’t know what to do to alter the situation. I decide I’ll try walking little by little, it’s better than sitting in one place. So it is that we finally reach the Resort. Olivia (Bill’s girlfriend) who is a physiotherapist, checks my feet, ices them and asks me to put them up and rest. I decided to do exactly that.

I miss the screening and Q & A of Joshua’s film “Forgiveness of Blood”.But I am too beaten to feel bad about that. While I rest I get many more cramps, but luckily I don’t have to climb.

One thought sticks with me as I sleep. The journey to Pavna and back was difficult, but it is over. The journey of my screenplay will begin after the Lab ends. I won’t have these lovely people with me at that time. I won’t have any help!!!

 

 

 

 

MUMBAI MANTRA SUNDANCE INSTITUTE SCREENWRITER'S LAB DAY 1

DAY 1: Screenwriter’s Lab.

The morning sky is divine.

But I have earthly things to mull over.

Anticipation is at a peak.

Will the eminent advisors be kind?

Will I be able to accept somebody pointing out the blemishes in my baby? (All creative art is like having a baby; you labour; you take the pains and you produce a bawling thing which takes a shape of its own after a while; sometimes to grow in someone else’s hands)

Would someone go one step further and call my baby ugly?

Daunting thoughts!

The tight regime leaves me with very little time to flagellate myself with self doubts. And the sumptuous breakfast helps me forget what’s in store.

There’s a camaraderie which has already set in among us fellows and that’s a great relief. Neha, Terrie and I already share a special bond. My sisters in writing.

 

Aparna shows the other side of herself. The smiling, welcoming, warm Aparna is almost replaced by the swift, firm ‘Hitler didi’. I love the change in her. I have to play the nagger everyday with my kids, so I’m luxuriating in getting mothered for a change!

Next stop is the Lehar Screening Room where we are going to see a documentary, “Waldo Salt:A Screenwriter’s Journey”. This screening is only for the Fellows while the Advisors meet to plot our fate for the day.

Waldo Salt is the writer of ‘Midnight Cowboy’ and ‘Coming Home’.

Waldo Salt, in the present, is shown addressing students and he quotes Picasso, “Art is the elimination of the unnecessary”. Whoa! I understand Picasso (Most times I don’t really understand his paintings, though I absolutely love La Guernica)

But how would I know how to eliminate the unnecessary when I don’t know what is necessary?

Waldo Salt’s life and journey as a writer is so inspiring and moving. A writer with leftist, socialist leanings in America, who is ostracised for being a communist.

Sigh! You can abolish slavery but not prejudice!!!

Waldo is practically jobless, but he has to write. He ghost writes. Meanwhile Stalin’s brand of Communism shatters his Utopian leftist beliefs.It takes a long time to overcome the crumbling of one’s ideals. But get up Waldo does, and how! He makes a come back with the poignant Midnight Cowboy. Absolutely unforgettable!

What a journey!

What a correct note to start the Lab with!

Write against all odds. Write period.

And so armed with our dreams we disperse to look for the advisor who would be our Guru for the next 2 hours.

 

BILL WHEELER: (The Hoax, The Cape, The Reluctant Fundamentalist): “Empowering”

 

Bill finds for us a comfortable place at the other end of the breakfast table. Bill’s blue-grey eyes smile at me kindly. I hear Michelle’s voice in my head, “Remember! Ask the right question”. But all I can come up with is whether he has taken any anti-histamines (he has a bad cold). He replies politely and then comes to ‘Tribhanga’. He reminds me that our talk is going to be a series of ‘thought experiments’. The description is so apt and so exciting. The visual of all my thoughts in a test tube comes to my head.  He asks me why I wanted to write this particular screenplay, what was the personal inspiration behind my characters. He listens very intently. I’m amazed at how easily I can crystallize my thoughts in his presence. But what amazes me even more is how deeply he feels for and how perfectly he understands the very Indian women in my script. I don’t need to explain the cultural nuances.

He’s on my side! I’m relieved.

He goads me into thinking of some of the points which he thinks could be fleshed out further, a relationship which needs to be emphasized. He asks me to write the 5 key scenes in my film script. I begin very surely and then start thinking of so many scenes, there are so many. But he’s very clear- only five.

I feel like a Masterchef contestant facing a pressure test. If I say garlic, will I be out of Masterchef?

Finally I agree on the 5 scenes that are all important to my narrative. As I look at them I realise that I could have chosen some others.

I’m thoroughly confused. Bill realises that I require some time to assimilate my thoughts. He leaves me alone to get some juice for himself (As a writer you are never alone, you always have your characters to keep you company- your little thought experiments!)

Bill returns. We talk about us, generally, for awhile. He is a very committed father so immediately we have a lot to discuss. Then he brings me back to some of the cinematic devices used in my screenplay. Ah! The purpose of what we write is to see it on screen.

In my screenplay, a film that has been made based on a book written by one of my protagonists,is used in two crucial scenes. Bill draws my attention to how little I have used this potent device. He asks me to think of other scenes that could be shown in the film within my film. I come up with two more situations. Bill likes the choices I’ve made. I realise the thoroughness with which Bill has read my screenplay, how much he has thought of each and every aspect of my writing. My heart fills with gratitude.

I’m not trying to demean our brethren in the Industry, but most people are interested only in criticising, and not very constructively. They’d rather put you down, than help you rise. The critics are no better. They have their favoured cliques and nothing remotely critical is ever written about ‘friends’. They usually pander to the Stars or Star directors and producers. It is so rare to find a person who is discussing, almost dissecting your writing, WITHOUT MALICE. Bill never once praises himself or puts down anybody else’s work. We are part of a very sacred discussion. He is an  advisor/mentor,  but shares his experiences with me as if my work is on par with his. I am completely humbled and thankful for this experience.

The session is over. I feel sad. I want it to continue. I don’t know whether I have thanked Bill enough. If I were Japanese, some elaborate bowing would have shown him how I felt. But we have to break for an hour for lunch because the next session is going to begin immediately after.

Bhookhe pet bhajan na hoye Gopala!

A sumptuous lunch awaits us. What a lucky bunch of Fellows we are; food for thought and food for nourishment in abundance. Both in conjunction is really rare.

One by one the advisors and Fellows stream into the lunch room. Some have an extra zing to their strides, others have slowed down a bit, some haven’t taken a break, but continue the session at lunch (Neha and sweet, warm Sabrina Dhawan are  discussing Neha’s screenplay ‘Forgiven’, they only pause their exchanges for quick bites of food). Some mull, some chew, some laugh, some think. Michelle, Paul, Rohit and Aparna are talking to each Fellow, trying to make sure that nobody is unnerved, battered or bruised by the discussion in any way. The clatter of cutlery soon overtakes all other sounds.

Before we know it, it’s time for our next session.

 

JOSHUA MARSTON:(Maria Full Of Grace, New York I Love You, Forgiveness of Blood) “Empirical”

 

Joshua’s steel grey eyes look straight at me. Unlike Bill he doesn’t take charge of the discussion right away. I try and think of a good question to ask but nothing seems to come to me. Then he asks about how I came about these characters and what I felt the theme was. I answered that as succinctly as possible. Then he asks me what my story is!

Er…um....story? Er… I seem to have forgotten to write it...I don’t seem to have one in a...umm... straightforward way.

Any which way will do!

Er…..ok…. And I proceed to tell him the story as I see it briefly.

He stops me and says that he doesn’t get a sense of the story I’m telling him now from the screenplay I’ve written.

The 10kms of rough patch before coming to the Resort seems rosy compared to what is happening to my stomach now!

What do I do? I don’t have a story! What am I doing here?

He tells me that any story has to have the main protagonist/s want something, somebody has to stop them from getting what they want and in the end they need to either get it or not get it! Simple!

Simple? I haven’t been able to do such a simple thing. Do I have the right to call myself a screenwriter?

I offer lamely that I concentrate more on the characters and theme rather than the story.

He tells me of three approaches to writing a screenplay, 1) Start with a story, write the appropriate characters and then arrive at the theme or 2) Think of a theme, then write the story and then arrive at the appropriate characters or 3) Write the characters, think of a theme and then write a story.

I identify my screenplay with number 3)

But he reminds me bluntly that I still have no story.

Whew! There can’t be any further discussion really. Unless I write a story how am I going to discuss this script with anyone?

I feel like a student who has come for an Arithmetic test without learning her Math tables.

Joshua then asks me to imagine various stories using my characters. Putting them in the weirdest situations and completing 10 different stories. In the first one I am to imagine that Anu (my main protagonist) wants to buy a house.In the next one Anu wants something else. With each new story Joshua keeps asking me questions about what my characters would do next to bring that particular story to rest. Wow! I get to know my characters inside out. What an exercise that is! What a worthwhile exercise that is for all writing!

I am exhausted emotionally! I feel as if I have just given a very tough and intense viva and haven’t really done very well.

Joshua suggests a few films I could see which could give me a perspective on my screenplay (should I call it that?)

I thank him. I am gutted. The only time Joshua smiles is when he tells me to forget about Anu trying to buy a house. He says that’s a horrible idea. Yup! Right!

I can see the long, arduous distance I have to travel before I can convert my ‘writing’ into even a semblance of a screenplay.

I walk towards the screening room trying to avoid everyone’s gaze. I know I’ll cry if someone as much as talks to me kindly.

I bury myself in the arms of the large chair in the screening room.

They are showing Kavanjit’s short film “Jagjeet” and Abhijit’s short film “Vanishing point”

“Jagjeet”is about the effect of the 1984 riots, when thousands of Sikhs were massacred, on a survivor who’s best friend’s family has lost their lives brutally. What an effective, moving short it is. I am feeling really low and vulnerable emotionally. I am trying my best not to bawl my heart out. Why are people so cruel? Does anything justify the killing of innocents? It's a beautifully created film. To capture the pain of the massacre on a shoe string budget and in such a short screen time is an amazing feat.Well done Kavanjit.

My hyperactive emotions are kept in check by Abhijit’s film “Vanishing Point”. A very well shot and smartly conceived film about a film director’s recce along with his cameraman buddy which goes terribly wrong. There’s a bit of a mystery to it when a turbanned villager keeps appearing before him time and again throughout his journey. Is the journey real or is it an illusion? There’s a point in the film where the director’s having a bad high (or coming out of it, I’m not sure)He gets a panic attack and doubts whether he can ever direct anything! It is uncannily similar to the fear that I am having about my writing. Except that I’m not high on any substance and the possibility that I can’t write is really very real.

As we return for dinner, to the comfort of good food, we Fellows exchange notes about the 1^st day of the Lab. Most are really pleased with the day. I am devastated. But Pratim looks positively ravaged. We all try to cheer him up.

It’s amazing how you forget your own troubles when you are helping others out of theirs!

Dinner is a time for reflection rather than revellery and the beautiful stars cast their magic.

But the night’s not over yet.

We see a film written by Bill and discuss it. To see one of our mentors in a position where his work is being judged and yet accepting all the criticism with grace makes me feel very small. There’s so much to learn!

It is way past our bedtime by the time the discussion actually gets over and we return to our rooms.

I’m missing my babies so much.

I sleep like a log till suddenly I’m wide awake at 4 am. I’ve just seen the house Anu wants to buy! I’m grinning like an idiot. Of all the stories that Joshua made me go through, I remember the weirdest. I understand why each one of us Fellows have to go through our trial by fire and come out of it polished, enriched,and purified.

Kabir says it so well:

                “Guru kumhaar shishya kumbh hai

                    Gadhi gadhi kaadhe khot

                     Antar haath sahaar de

                      Baahir maare chot”

Thank you Bill, thank you Joshua.

Back to dreams of the house that Anu built.

Tomorrow? Day 2 of course J  J